Daylight
by ExcaliburMaiden
Summary: Would she view him in the same way if she knew he was the legendary Emrys and the last dragonlord? As much as he hated to hide his true self from her, he wouldn't dare to hope that he would see anything other than fear or mistrust in her eyes if he told her the truth.


Song: Daylight by Maroon 5  
Category: Het (Canon)  
Characters/Pairings: Merlin/Mithian  
Rating/Warnings: T  
Word Count: 4,234  
Summary: (This is for the Valentine's Day writing challenge.) Would she view him in the same way if she knew he was the legendary Emrys and the last dragonlord? As much as he hated to hide his true self from her, he wouldn't dare to hope that he would see anything other than fear or mistrust in her eyes if he told her the truth.

Special thanks to sidhe_faerie`s friend and Captain Ozone for editing .

I don't own Merlin.

Gwen smiled brightly as she helped Merlin wrap the last flower garland around a column in the banquet hall.

"It looks lovely," she said, sounding quite pleased when they stepped back to admire their handiwork. "I know they are only silk flowers, but you can hardly tell the difference. Who would have guessed that you would have such an eye for flower arrangements?"

"Well I've had a bit of practice," he teased with a mischievous glint in his blue eyes. "I always pick flowers for you because Arthur is rubbish at it."

The queen laughed because she knew it was true. "I remember the time he gave me a few broken wildflowers that he found by the wayside as an apology."

Her laughter made him smile. "That's Arthur for you. He's completely hopeless."

"I heard that," the king said when he approached, pretending to be angry as he gazed at his manservant with disapproval. "I chose purple wildflowers because its Guinevere's favorite color."

Gwen greeted her husband with a kiss on the cheek, and in turn he encircled her waist in his arms. Merlin's dramatic sigh reminded his friends that he was still nearby.

"I didn't have to remind him about that. Although that doesn't explain how the flowers were damaged during delivery."

"Shut up, Merlin."

The trio glanced around the banquet hall, admiring the flickering candlelight and the way the red rose garland suited the Pendragon banners aligning the stone walls.

"It's not half bad when you consider that he helped," Arthur joked, smiling against his wife's wavy, dark hair.

She playfully slapped his arm, and he tightened his hold around her waist. "Arthur! Merlin's been a great help, and the hall looks lovely." She smiled warmly at Merlin, emphasizing her point.

The young manservant smiled wickedly. "It's Arthur. His compliments are nearly as bad as his poetry."

Gwen giggled while her husband pretended to scowl in a way that he thought was menacing. "That's extremely funny and clever. There is no limit to your wit."

As always Merlin never failed to rise to the occasion. "Yes, I was hoping you would finally notice."

"Don't get cocky."

A few hours later in Gwen's chambers, Merlin helped finish the last of the ball's preparations.

"Thank you for your help," Gwen said, looking up from the small pile of letters in front of her. "But I think that's the last of them."

Merlin placed a neat pile on the desk beside her elbow before turning to leave her chambers. "You're welcome."

"Wait," she called out. Her dark eyes widened slightly, and a gentle smile tugged at the corners of her lips.

"I know that look," he said when he turned to face her. "What are you scheming?"

"I'm not scheming."

He raised an eyebrow at her. "Gwen?"

She waved her hands in mock surrender. "Oh alright… I was hoping that you would wear the red overcoat and boots Arthur loaned you for tonight. We both wanted you to attend the St. Valentine's Day ball as a guest and a friend. "

"Well... I don't know," he answered slowly, thinking of how he might have to keep company with someone like Lady Vivian. The spoiled noblewoman treated servants very poorly. He shuddered at the thought of spending an evening with her. It would be a nightmare. He was almost sorry that she was free of the enchantment. She was much kinder while under the love spell.

"Audrey will make her famous dumplings and the pudding you love so much."

Merlin smiled at her hopeful expression. "Are you trying to bait me with dumplings and pudding?"

"Yes. Is it working?"

"It's a great sacrifice, but I accept," he teased, grinning. "Thank you."

Gwen gathered her skirt and rose from her chair, picking up a letter from the stack. "You can truly thank me by enjoying yourself and taking one of these."

He gazed at the small slip of white paper she handed him in confusion, noting the ink etching of a swan on the front.

"Your match will have the same animal on her note, so she will know that you are her escort for the evening", she explained.

"I knew you were scheming."

She laughed and then playfully shoved him out of her chambers. "Now go get dressed."

"Gwen selected all the matches, so you can rest assured that she has chosen wisely," Gaius whispered, trying to reassure the flustered young man standing beside him in the crowded banquet hall. But neither man was prepared for what happened next. Princess Mithian entered, dressed in a lavender floral embroidered dress, holding a slip of paper marked with a swan. As she drew nearer, her lips formed a pleased smile when she realized that Merlin was her escort for the evening. Gaius chuckled and then leaned forward to whisper in his ear again, reminding him to close his gaping mouth. The court physician encouragingly nudged him in the princess's direction.

"I hope your speechlessness is meant to be a good sign," she joked good-naturedly, offering him her hand. "It's good to see you again."

He broke out of his stupor and remembered to kiss her hand. His full lips gently brushed across her knuckles before he lifted his head to meet her gaze. "Sorry," he muttered quickly. "It's always a pleasure, princess."

"There's no need to be so formal. Call me, Mithian."

Merlin smiled at her, beginning to feel a bit more at ease as he offered her his arm and led her toward their places. He caught Gwen's eye from across the room as she smiled approvingly. The ever observant Mithian noticed the exchange of knowing smiles.

"Your queen is quite the schemer, is she not?"

"Yes," he answered thoughtfully, remembering how pleased Gwen was about the budding friendship between the princess and him that had grown stronger over time. She often commented on how well they got along and that there was a natural ease between them. Merlin couldn't help but wonder how long Gwen had been planning on trying to make them a couple. He casually glanced at Mithian as she sat down beside him. Her dark, slightly curled hair cascaded the curve of her back. She was beautiful. There was no denying that. He had always known this, but she seemed far more beautiful now with the candlelight shining against her elegant features, making her brown eyes glisten under the delicate frame of long eyelashes.

She reached over her plate of roast duck to grasp her wine-filled goblet, taking a dainty sip before she turned to face her companion with a warm smile. "I'm glad to be in your company. There is never a dull moment with you."

He scoffed playfully as he picked at his half eaten dumpling. "I'm not very interesting. Polishing armor and washing Arthur's socks is hardly an adventure."

Mithian huffed when she placed her goblet down. "Nonsense…you are far more than just a servant."

Then he looked up from his plate to gaze at her. "Am I?"

"Yes. You are wise, thoughtful and quite handsome as well. How many servants can advise a king and protect him with valor that is equal to any knight?"

He ducked his head as he felt heat rising in his cheeks. "Thank you."

"It's true, and I meant every single word of it," she said, mischievously poking him between the ribs.

He made a face and then gasped dramatically. "Ouch! Why are you nobles so violent? First Arthur hits me, and now I'm being poked by the princess of Nemeth. Will it ever stop?"

She laughed. "Maybe… there's one condition."

He grinned at her as he rubbed his side. "Now you're violent and demanding. You're more like Arthur than I thought."

"Oh I doubt he is as light on his feet. Come, dance with me," she said when the minstrels' sweeping melodies filled the banquet hall.

Merlin surprised everyone with his graceful dancing. King Arthur was the clumsy one on the dance floor, and it was very unlikely that his manservant or the knights would ever let him forget it.

As the evening passed, he felt silly for ever having been nervous in her company.

Three years later- Merlin lay still in the dark, quietly watching the moonlight shine through the dusty little window across from his bed. The pale rays of light stretched the length of the spacious room making shadows dance along the gentle contours of his face. All that could be heard was the steady rhythm of his breathing which kept time with his heartbeat creating a melody as natural as the magic humming under his skin. For once it wasn't destiny that kept him awake on this cold, lonely winter night in Nemeth. Oddly enough it was the love he felt for a woman; and not just any woman, she was a princess. A huff of air escaped his nose, causing a faint cloud to hover above him before it melted away in the darkness. He scooted further down into the mound of blankets and let his eyes blaze gold causing a comforting rush of warmth to spread throughout his guest chambers. Then the fireplace's dying flames sprang up, crackling in the otherwise silent room.

He sat up, running long fingers through his dark tousled hair. Clearly he wasn't going to get any sleep tonight. Worry flooded every corner of his sleep-deprived mind. Merlin quietly climbed out of bed to put on his boots and worn, brown jacket. Carefully, he pushed the door open, flinching slightly when it creaked, and headed out. Then he wandered through the shadowy corridors until his feet led him to Mithian`s chambers. He lifted a fist to knock on her door, but then he thought better of it and let his hand drop to his side. She had been overwhelmed by guests all throughout the day after news of her father's death was spread through the kingdom and beyond. It seemed Morgana was not Nemeth`s only enemy. A Saxon assassin infiltrated the castle and laced her father's goblet with poison. When Arthur heard the news, he had left straight away taking Merlin and a few knights along for the journey. They helped her arrange the funeral and supported her through this dark time. She was the sole heir to the throne and must carry her destiny's burden by continuing the royal legacy. And no one understood the burden of destiny better than Merlin.

He didn't want to rob her of what little rest she could get, especially when she had such a stressful and emotionally draining day.

But then the door slowly opened to reveal a troubled princess with red rimmed eyes.

"Merlin," she said softly in surprise.

He stepped closer, gently trailing a finger over her tear stained cheeks. Her sadness mirrored his. "I wanted to see how you were."

"Thoughtful as always," she whispered hoarsely. "I was just on my way to see you. I suppose I'm doing as well as one can in such circumstances."

Mithian stepped aside, inviting him to enter her chambers. He was relieved to see that her dinner tray on the bedside table was not untouched, even if she'd only eaten half of her meal. She noticed how he eyed the plates as she walked by him to sit on the edge of her bed.

"You are such a mother hen, my love."

He smiled faintly as he sat down beside her. "Well, I did promise to look after you and I will."

She wrapped her arms around herself, smiling sadly. Then he noticed how thin her nightdress was and that her dainty feet were bare. Mithian placed a hand on his knee before he could rise to stoke the fire.

"I'm fine. I always thought that when the time came I would be ready to be queen. I just never imagined it would happen like this. But I thought …at least I hoped that you would be by my side."

Merlin gently tucked a loose lock of hair behind her ear, and she leaned into his touch, softly kissing his palm. He felt torn as his eyes scanned the dimly lit room, looking in every possible direction but towards her. Then he gazed into her sad but hopeful eyes.

"I can't".

She reached out, grasping his hands desperately.

"If you asked Arthur surely he would… Are you worried that my kingdom won't accept you?"

He swallowed down the lump forming in his throat. He couldn't tell her he had an all encompassing destiny that he couldn't escape even if he wanted to. That the magic pulsing through him and tingling his fingertips to be released was as natural to him as the air they breathed. She wouldn't understand. Would she view him in the same way if she knew he was the legendary Emrys and the last dragonlord? As much as he hated to hide his true self from her, he wouldn't dare to hope that he would see anything other than fear or mistrust in her eyes if he told her the truth.

"I do love you, but I can't be your consort. Children fathered by the bastard son of a peasant could never be heirs to the throne."

He gently placed a finger against her lips to silence her protest before he continued. "I'm only a servant, and I'm not my own man. You deserve a king who can rule by your side."  
She pushed his hand away rising from the bed to stand beside the fireplace, staring blankly at the flickering flames as she rubbed at the steady flow of tears traveling down her face impatiently. Then she turned to face him, looking so small, fragile and wretched that she tore his heart in two.

"Then this is how it ends? I foolishly dared to hope that you and I could be like Arthur and Gwen. I knew it couldn't be, but I love you and I wanted to think that it might be possible. Very few royals are fortunate enough to marry for the sake of love alone."

His tear-filled eyes shone brightly in the firelight when he reached out to her. "It's never foolish to hope. Come here."

So she went to him, unthinkingly running her fingers over the scarred flesh of her wrist, a constant reminder of her time with Morgana. But she didn't want to think about that or how her kingdom was never the same after the destruction the witch and King Odin had caused. Merlin took off his boots and climbed into the bed, holding Mithian close when she lay down beside him.

"King Lear of Northumbria is a brute," Merlin exclaimed, staring at Mithian with disbelief as they stood in the sunlit throne room at noon.

"Yes," she admitted while running her slender fingers over her father's jeweled crown, which laid beside her mother's on a red velvet pillow on the wooden table. "He is also a great warrior that even drives fear into the hearts of the Saxons. The fierceness of his army is well known throughout the land. He offers the strength and protection that my kingdom needs. Nemeth is at its weakest. I can't let my kingdom crumble and my father's legacy be destroyed."

Her voice faltered but then grew stronger as she continued. "That is why I have chosen him as my husband. The Saxons killed my father, and there is nothing to stop them from coming for me next."

A heart wrenching tension lingered between them when the word husband tumbled from her lips. Neither of them dared to look into each others eyes should their longing be exposed.

"I won't let that happen," he said earnestly, stepping closer and taking hold of her trembling hands. She looked up meeting his fiercely protective gaze.

"You'll be countless miles away in Camelot. I appreciate all you and Arthur have done, but he has his own kingdom to tend to. Neither of you can continually journey to and from Camelot whenever I am in distress. I think Arthur is right. It will be for the best when you both depart tomorrow. I can't have my heart's desire present while my future husband is visiting."

She withdrew her hands, staring at her shoes as she backed away from him and ignored her heartache.

Mithian was never the sort to drown her sorrows with drink, but she couldn't sleep, and she needed something to soothe her nerves. The wine warmed her from head to toe, but it could not rid her of longing or sadness. She pulled her dressing gown closer to her slender frame as she left the kitchen and headed down the shadowy corridor. She saw a door ajar, following the light that streamed into the hallway. The heartsick young woman entered Merlin's guest chambers, finding him sitting on the bed.

"Mithian?"

"Couldn't sleep."

He moved aside making space for her to sit beside him.

"You needn't worry. You'll make a great queen."

"I`d make a far better one with you by my side."

He glanced at her sadly, the soft glow of candlelight shining against his face. Before he could respond, she gently cupped his face in her hands and kissed him. One kiss led to many, and he readily returned each one. She circled her arms around his neck, and he tangled his fingers in her hair. Their kisses became more passionate. Her gown slipped from her shoulder, and he curiously ran his calloused fingers over the soft, exposed flesh. She sighed into his mouth, trembling. They parted for breath, staring at one another heatedly with reddened lips.

The loose ribbon at the front of her gown caused the fabric to sag, revealing the enticing curves of her breasts. The lusty gleam in his ocean blue eyes made her heart race. Wrenching his eyes from her, he turned away. He wanted her, but she was going to be married. It didn't matter that he disapproved. He knew she didn't love King Lear, but the marriage was not about that.

"You should go."

Disappointment made her heart sink.

"All my life I have followed the path that was set before me. I have always done what was requested without complaint. Is it wrong to have a moment just for myself? What if I choose to give myself to you?"

" Mithian," he whispered hoarsely, struggling to remain true to his resolve.

"Please look at me," she begged, reaching out to him, and he did. "This is the only moment we`ll ever have."

Temptation got the better of him, and he gave into it.

"Close the door," he commanded softly.

Mithian stood up, walking to the door to shut it.

"Come here."

She did. He pulled at her gown`s ribbon causing the white silk to slip from her body and pool at her feet. She felt him shudder when he lifted her up onto the bed, placing her beneath him. He pulled his tunic over his head, carelessly tossing it aside, and leaned over to blow out the bedside candle.

Merlin took notice of how she sighed in pleasure, curled her toes and writhed beneath him when he caressed a sensitive spot along the smooth, pale skin of her lithe body. He was guided by instinct rather than experience.

Afterward they lay still in the dark, flushed, breathing heavily and caught up in the blissful afterglow of their lovemaking. She snuggled up against him, resting her head on his chest while he idly traced lazy circles against the curve of her back with his index finger. They enjoyed the moment while it lasted.

In the morning, she stood in the courtyard clad in a white fur cloak with her counsel, watching King Arthur, his manservant and knights mount their horses and gallop toward the city gates. Her windblown hair shielded her face from those around her which she was grateful for. They wouldn't see the tears forming in her dark eyes. She noticed how Merlin's shoulders slumped and that he gripped the reins so tightly his knuckles turned white. But he didn't look back.

_It was for the best_, she told herself. She had to keep up appearances, it wouldn't do for her to lose her composure in front of her officials. Mithian turned away, leaving the cold to enter the castle's warmth. She would always remember the night they spent together and treasure it as long as she lived. Even as she walked the path that led to a lonely, uncertain future.

Months later,Merlin jolted awake when he felt the faint call of magic echoing around him and enveloping him in its warmth. He nearly tumbled out of bed in haste to seek out the source, stumbling in the dim light to find his boots before he hurried out. The warlock tripped on his way past Gaius` slumbering form, startling him.

He squinted at the young man and sat up groggily. "What's happened, Merlin?"

"I tripped."

Gaius lifted a brow at him. "I realize that, but where are you off to in such a hurry?"

"There's no time to explain. I have to go," he said a bit breathlessly, rushing out the door and into the torch lit hallway. His boots skidded along the stone floor, and he almost crashed into a few guards as he ran down a narrow corridor. He followed the invisible trail, allowing his senses to guide him until it led him to an opened door. He entered to find Arthur and Gwen standing beside Mithian as she sat in bed, cradling a raven haired baby close to her breast. All eyes landed on him, and an awkward tension filled the room. Merlin felt as if the air were stolen from his lungs as he grew paler and tried not to gape at the cooing, dark eyed baby in his former lover's arms.

The baby's magic called him here!

Mithian lowered her tearful gaze unaware of the true source of Merlin's turmoil while she continued her conversation with the royal couple.

"Lear called her unnatural … and an abomination. He wanted to be rid of her."

Her lip quivered as tears trailed down her pale cheeks. "I'm sorry for burdening you with my troubles, but I didn't know who else to turn to."

Gwen sat down beside her, placing an arm around her friend. "You aren't a burden. Don't ever think that. I'm glad you came to us." Then she glanced helplessly toward her husband as tears dripped from her dark lashes.

"We'll find a way to settle this," Arthur said in a tone that he hoped was reassuring. In reality, he had no idea at all. Despite the havoc and misfortune magic caused in his life, he knew that this sweet, little infant did not deserve to die. He wearily ran his fingers through his disheveled, golden hair while the baby blinked at him curiously from within the warmth of her mother's embrace.

"If there's anything you need, you only have to ask."

"Thank you, Arthur," Mithian whispered hoarsely.

Her daughter began to cry, placing her tiny hand against her mother's chest. She nuzzled against her breast hungrily. Gwen smiled knowingly at the little one and then whispered in Arthur's ear. He nodded in understanding, taking his wife's hand, and headed for the door. She glanced sadly at Merlin. He didn't need to be told. However he couldn't force his feet to move from where they were planted. He looked up to see Mithian struggling with the fussy infant then stepped forward, gently lifting her daughter from her arms. So she could successfully loosen the knotted ribbon at the front of gown.

"I've missed you," she admitted sadly, not trusting herself to meet his gaze.

"And I, you," he answered softly, carefully handing her back the child. He looked away when she bared her breast, and the baby began to suckle greedily.

Mithian`s long hair was draped over her breast as she nursed her daughter when he turned to look at her. His eyes finally captured her gaze. A torrent of indefinable emotions shone in the blue depths that plagued her dreams, nearly leaving her breathless. Both ignored the inappropriateness of the current situation.

"What is it?"

"What's her name?"

"Leyla."

He repeated the name softly, and she begged him once again to answer her previous question. But he did not. He turned to shut the door and then walked to the end of her bed. Tears shone in his eyes when he spoke.

"I'm a sorcerer. I have magic. And I won't let any harm come to you or our daughter."

She shut her eyes, and a lone tear trailed the curve of her cheek as she released a shaky breath.

"I always knew there was something special about you. It was something that I couldn't define. I don't regret the night we spent together. But what are we going to do? "

He sat down next to her, kissing the top of her head. "I'm going to look after you." Mithian laid her head against his shoulder, feeling too weary to protest. When Lear came for them - and she knew he would - he would have to face the might of Camelot's knights and a sorcerer. For now, she and Leyla were safe, and that was all that mattered.


End file.
